Three Mediator-Approved Tips to Achieving a Successful Remote Mediation Session

The ongoing pandemic continues to require family law practitioners to practice in new ways. For mediators, shifting from in-person to virtual mediation sessions generated a variety of challenges. Even as many have adapted to remote or virtual mediation, difficulties including comfort with software, aligning on expectations and requirements, and catching non-verbal cues in an online setting remain. 

Here, we cover three essential tips from practicing mediators to help ensure success during remote mediation. These tips come from our webinar, Best Practices for the Future of Family Law Mediation, hosted in October 2020.

1. Help the parties get comfortable with the video conferencing software

Video conferencing software is more popular than ever now, yet some people are still getting used to using it for important meetings—let alone at all. J. Alex Jacobson, Founder of Jacobson Mediation Group, believes that getting everyone familiar with the video conferencing software you’re using is critically important to the success of remote mediation. 

Jacobson has found success in having initial consultations with the parties over the video conferencing platform they’ll use for the mediation. She recommends covering the basics of how the platform works and how to use special features, like breakout rooms for having private conversations with counsel during the session. 

2. Establish rules to ensure comfort and privacy before you begin

“Mediation works in large part if people are comfortable physically and have emotional safety,” says Hon. Helaine L. Berger (Ret.), Senior Mediator and Arbitrator at ADR Systems. To provide that level of comfort and safety, Berger will establish a few crucial rules for everyone to abide by throughout the mediation session.

Berger says that it is imperative that no one records the session. Some video conferencing software, like Zoom, will allow you to modify settings to prevent meeting participants from recording. Nevertheless, setting this standard right from the start can help to increase emotional comfort for everyone involved. 

In addition to no recording, it’s equally critical for the parties to be in a private spot during the session. If they are to be in a room with anyone, it may be their attorney, but set the standard that they are not to be in the same room as each other, their kids, or anyone else. 

Last but not least, address the issue of physical comfort. Berger explains that she often sees how participants in mediation may end up staying in front of the screen for so long that they don’t think to take care of basic needs like going to the bathroom or getting a bite to eat. As the mediator, be mindful of this and make the call to take breaks if need be. 

3. Put down your notepad to closely observe both parties during mediation

Non-verbal cues have traditionally played a significant role in mediators’ work, so when you’re leading a virtual mediation session, looking for whatever cues you can is key. Ketan Soni, Attorney and Mediator at Soni Brendle PLLC, suggests that in order to hold a successful mediation session, all mediators must up their game with active listening. 

Soni suggests that mediators prioritize watching the screen to see the parties and how they behave over taking meticulous notes. “When you take notes, you look down,” says Soni. “When you look down, you might miss something about the parties’ behavior. The details can be important, but first, we have to see if these folks are really engaged in the process.”

Looking for more essential tips from mediators on how to achieve successful remote mediation sessions? Check out our webinar, Best Practices for the Future of Family Law Mediation.